5 Things You Can Do as "Me" before becoming "We"

I want to go back and expound on something that I'd written to the singles in an earlier post. The message was that it is important to actually be a 'Me' before you become a 'We'. You're not married yet because you're not SINGLE yet. You have not truly experienced singleness in heart.

Afraid to be alone, many women will not take the time to just be with themselves and experience themselves in all of their greatness. I've heard many excuses such as 'I don't like being alone' or 'It's boring doing things things by myself' or 'I'll look crazy if I do that by myself' or my favorite of all times, 'What will people say about me if I do that alone?'

Who cares what others say or think of you? Don't be defined by other people's opinion of you. You are who you say you are and more importantly, you are who God says you are. Before you can be joined with another person,
take the time to become single in heart. Date yourself; Fall in love with yourself; Pamper yourself. Just get to know and enjoy your own self.

Here are some tips that I would advise you to do before 'me' becomes 'we':

1. Go to a nice restaurant and dine as a single. In other words, do it alone. Relax in the ambiance of the restaurant and enjoy a nice meal, compliments of YOU. I quite enjoy it and will do it often.

2. Go to a movie as a single. It does not matter what the movie is, just enjoy it alone. I personally prefer to watch a movie that will inspire me to think about 'me'. And besides, with no one to talk to, I get to really soak up every line in the movie. I enjoy listening for the 'punch line' in the movie.

3. Go on a vacation as a single. Now I know some of you are thinking, "What? Travel alone, no way". Yes, that is what I suggest that you do. You will be amazed at how much you will learn about yourself when you do this. I traveled alone to Jamaica, for a week. I stayed at a resort and was able to just relax. I spent time on the beach and also participated in the activities that were offered by the resort. This time also gave me plenty of opportunity to really get to know me. It was an experience that I will always cherish.

4. Live as a single. If you have not done so already, live alone with no roommates, no parents, no siblings. Just you. Use this time to know your likes and dislikes of living arrangements. Master the art of being financially responsible, including paying your bills on time and saving money.

5. Enjoy other activities such as long walks in nature, plays, concerts, picnics, church, etc. ALONE. Enjoy all of the rich experiences, you guessed it, alone. Turn off those mobile devices and just be totally engaged in whatever is happening around you. There is a whole world out there besides cyber space. Enjoy it.

The idea is to master the art of singleness by living, laughing and loving yourself. After you have the mastered the art of singleness, then the 'ME' is now ready to become a 'WE'. Free up that seat next to you on that train to your destiny, by riding alone first. Then and only then will the 'we' that you've been waiting for, come on board.

I have personally done all of these things, alone. And the experiences opened my mind and my heart to defining who I am. Each time that I do something alone, it creates a new awareness of of me on my journey of self discovery; it creates a singleness in heart.

Have you experienced the 'singleness in heart'?


Cassandra: Copyright © 2010.