A Spiritual Connection

In my last post, I wrote something that I wanted to elaborate on.

"And I'm beginning to realize that I miss that kind of connection with someone, which is a sort of soulful and spiritual way to share and understand exactly where the other one is coming from. I feel that this type of connection is missing from my life and that I have no one to talk to who would really understand where I am, right here, right now in this very moment."

source

In the post, I was speaking in terms of not having a close or best friend who I feel that I can connect with spiritually and soulfully. I also mentioned that most of my social circle includes family members and a few  others who I consider friends and speak with every couple of months or socially through social media.

But what I miss the most is the feeling of connecting and being understood by those I relate to. That seems to be the biggest aha! moment of my reality right now. I really don't feel like I'm understood spiritually by those whom I have the most contact with. I don't feel like they really 'get me' with the conversations that I want to have. I realize that I have NOT being showing up as my authentic self in any of my current relationships, family or friendly, because I feel that I am not understood. So, I show up with conversations that serve others more than they serve me because those types of conversations are what they understand best. I feel like I have to 'be' who or what others want me to be in order to maintain those relationships and not cause anyone to feel that I don't want to 'be bothered' with them, which is what I hear often.

There is a different level of conversations that I really desire to have as part of my being. And as I said in the previous post, places I desire to be that truly line up with who I have become on this spiritual growth journey for the past 2.5 years. That is what's sorely missing in my life. I need to have those types of spiritual conversations and have that soulful experiences with a close friend who I can share my inner most thoughts with and pleased with knowing that they are right there with me in those conversations instead of trying to figure out what the heck I'm talking about. And yes, before you say it, I know that God is all of that for me, but here, I speak in terms of my human experience and connecting with another human being. And this does not have anything to do with any sort of romanticism or romantic partnerships. That's not what I am referring to. I'm referring to spiritual partnerships which means relating with someone who is equal with me in terms of our spiritual growth on this journey who clearly understands what I am saying to them and vice versa. And that can be either a male or female partnership, not romantic relationship (which for me, is with males only). If it happens that I can get two in one (spiritual partner who is also my romantic partner) then woohoo!

I also realized that I seclude myself a lot of times because of this feeling that since I am not being my authentic self around others, I just rather be by myself. And that's what I do. This is a hard reality for me, but I don't want to 'fake' who I am anymore. I can't and therefore I won't. That's the thing about showing up as the 'true you', you get to fully express who you are and you walk in that. That's the journey that I am choosing to follow now.


Thanks for reading. Leave a comment and feel free to share this post. You are Destined for Purpose: Empowered with Passion.